Saturday, November 8, 2014

Change

To make the form, nature, content, future course, etc., of something (or someone) different from what it is or from what it would be if left alone. 

The literal story of my life these days.

When we first moved here, I picked up a small intriguing journal at TJ Max. The cover of it says, "Do one thing every day that scares you." I bought it with the ambition to really do something simple every day that terrified me - whether it was going to the ward's playgroup and making new friends, calling or texting a new friend, going and looking for a job, etc.. anything that would stretch me and motivate me to do more than be a hermit in my new home and new city. I'm not quite as ambitious at physically writing the scary things I do in the journal as I hoped I would be, but I think the Lord took my ambition and is running full speed ahead with it. If I wrote in that journal religiously, every day would have a list of my scary accomplishments of the day. 

We've been here in Kansas City for 3 and half months, and during this time have experienced nothing but change! Sometimes it's been awesome, other times it's been more than difficult, and all the time it's making us stronger, bringing us closer, and somehow molding us into the people we're ultimately supposed to become. I haven't written on here for quite some time, so let me fill those of you in who don't know already, on some of these adventurous changes that are molding our lives currently!

1. At the beginning of September, after only literally one month of being here in KC, I was called to be the relief society president in our ward. (For my non-member friends, I explain this position as being the leader of all the women in our church congregation.. big job!) You are probably thinking to yourself, "Are you kidding me?!", which truthfully are the same exact words I said to the bishop when he extended the calling to me :) You can imagine that no one, including myself, would have picked this baby-faced 25 year old girl with no children out of the crowd to be the new RS president of a family ward, but that's what happened. And you don't really say no to the very humbling responsibility extended to you by a servant of the Lord. So that's one of my new adventures right now! 

This new responsibility has it's definite challenges, roller coaster of emotions, unexpected time consuming events, but with the difficulties come the humbling experiences of being an instrument in the hands of the Lord. It's one of the hardest things I've ever been asked to do. And because of that, I know that by the end of my time serving, I will hopefully be a little closer to becoming the person my Heavenly Father knows I can be. I am extremely humbled by the trust He has put in me, my testimony, and my gifts and abilities. I am relying more on the enabling power of the Savior's atonement, because I simply can't do this on my own. And as hard as this is, and as hard as the adversary continues to work on me and my self esteem every single day, I am grateful I don't have to do it alone. I'm grateful for the blessings I've seen in my own life already, and in the lives of the wonderful people I've been blessed to serve. The Lord's work is remarkable.

So yeah, shocker? Don't worry, it was for me too. I think I'll have the hang of it just in time for me to be released :)

2. Another change is going from binge watching netflix shows every day, to being able to practice my music therapy again :) At the end of August, a part-time music therapy position opened at the children's hospital here in KC. Now, for anyone who knows me knows that my internship at Primary Children's Hospital was one of the best things that has ever happened to me and my music therapy career. I was ecstatic about the possibility of this opportunity. I was sick of sitting around my house, and needed a purpose to my being in Missouri. 

So I applied for the job end of August, then..... never heard from them. I waited, and waited. Finally after 3 weeks of waiting and thinking they had already hired someone else, I received a call about coming in for an interview. Woot! So I went, showed my stuff, then waited some more. After another month of waiting, and for sure thinking this time they had found someone better, I got the call that I had received the job. I think Cam was more excited than me! haha I don't know how to be happy for myself sometimes. But alas, I was excited :) So here I am, working in a children's hospital again providing music therapy to the kiddos. It's definitely different than I imagined, but I'm grateful to be contributing to society, and grateful to be using what I know to help my amazing patients.

I am working part time, which is perfect for my new church calling, and med-school wife status. It's different than I imagined as I primarily work in the rehab clinic providing procedure support to the patients receiving botox injections. I know what you're thinking, and no, these kids don't have wrinkles already! I primarily see kiddos with cerebral palsy or other issues with muscle spasticity, who need the injections to loosen up their very tight and contracting muscles. The injections are extremely painful, and the anticipation waiting for the procedure can be killer as well. I get to spend a good chunk of time with the kids and families decreasing anxiety before the procedure, then try to really work my magic as they're receiving the painful injections. So I'm back to singing "Old MacDonald" and "Wheels on the Bus" all day long, and happy about it!

3. If you've made it through this entire novel, I congratulate you! I can reassure you my next post will be more exciting as I have to document the week I ran away to Cancun with my family last month :) Until then, the last major change we're working through is learning how to be in medical school. There's not too much to say, except that it's not always easy, and not always fun. BUT, we have started to find our groove, have made some incredible friends, and we're just learning as we go! We have an awesome ward, where we truly have a wonderful support group of friends. There are so many med-school families in our ward, all at different stages of the med-school process, so it's been nice for us to see that people do survive. They even have happy families and cute children through it all :) So we're grateful for them, and for our other friends Cam has made at school. These 2 shy introverts are all around grateful to have nice people in our lives! It's different though. I see Cam for the few minutes every night we eat dinner together, and other then that it's a grand show of "hello, goodbye, have fun studying!" He's doing so well though, and I'm extremely proud of him. He's still the best listener, still makes time to watch our silly shows together, we still go on little dates and have FHE, and he still makes me laugh when I've had a tough day (which is like every day ha). 

So... change. It's difficult. But it's the only way we grow. And I don't know about you, but even though I'm not a fan of it, I'm also not content with remaining stagnant and complacent. So in the end, I'm grateful for my little journal that reminds me that change and scary things are for our benefit in the long run.